Contiuning on Doggie
Oct. 15th, 2014 12:10 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
doggiedynastyI don't like having regrets.
I'm facing cowardice again. If I think "I want to", or "I can", such as being a pilot or joining the military, it'd be enough to put some faith in the ability called "trying". Still now, I keep holding myself back.
Just like being a game master for RPGS. Just what went wrong?
Reflecting, I often found myself not liking the crew that I'm with. An unmotivated, insulting group. Play-by-post RPGS grew tedious. Maybe I shouldn't say that; games are like that when you play a game more than once, or various genres. I'm having the same feelings in workplace. I sense that a part of my crew is dragging and not that fabulous, or is it my imagination?
But more importantly, I again forget how to love myself, to stop worrying, and to stop staying in one spot because I feel some burden.
Being positive, enthusiasm, I have these. But I always worry about accumulating knowledge. Indecision, feeling that I don't have the right talent because I keep being turned down. I let the past fuel my insecurities because of what people said to me.
"No...I can't be a leading type. [I did that before]".
But I think, it looks like, I'm really depended on because of something I have.
I'm facing cowardice again. If I think "I want to", or "I can", such as being a pilot or joining the military, it'd be enough to put some faith in the ability called "trying". Still now, I keep holding myself back.
Just like being a game master for RPGS. Just what went wrong?
Reflecting, I often found myself not liking the crew that I'm with. An unmotivated, insulting group. Play-by-post RPGS grew tedious. Maybe I shouldn't say that; games are like that when you play a game more than once, or various genres. I'm having the same feelings in workplace. I sense that a part of my crew is dragging and not that fabulous, or is it my imagination?
But more importantly, I again forget how to love myself, to stop worrying, and to stop staying in one spot because I feel some burden.
Being positive, enthusiasm, I have these. But I always worry about accumulating knowledge. Indecision, feeling that I don't have the right talent because I keep being turned down. I let the past fuel my insecurities because of what people said to me.
"No...I can't be a leading type. [I did that before]".
But I think, it looks like, I'm really depended on because of something I have.
